You "protoplasmal primordial atomic globule."
What a fantastic insult, except, that it's truly descriptive of what we are. Does everyone call someone a name at some time or other? I frequently mutter "idiot" under my breath in reference to (not "reverence to") my husband. It's hard to tell sometimes if he's serious and I flat out told him the other day after an attempt to jest- a WEAK attempt, "You may be joking, but my first instinct is to think, 'what an idiot,' and that's what stays with me."
Certain words I just don't like to hear or hear other people called. Faggot is a word I despise. I'm not sure an opera singer could make that word sound pleasant. I'm still offended by the 7 words you can't say on TV- well, most of them any way. Bad words to my kids are words like: dumb, stupid, jerk. I'll never forget Sarah coming home from school in 1st grade and whispering to me that someone said a bad word. I was mildly concerned because any secret divulging stance is sure to draw Jacob closer. I almost laughed with relief when Sarah breathed the word in my ear: stupid. I've volunteered in Sarah's school and I've heard a lot worse; usually from a special needs child being towed down the hall. Nonetheless I believe there is some instinctual need to call another person an unflattering name. From a young age kids pick up on this name-calling they hear others using.
On an hours-long trip to Ocean City Sarah and Jacob began to call each other moe-ron (moron). Tim asked the kids where they'd heard that word and before the kids could answer I said, "Probably because you've called a dozen other drivers just that name!" Now, honestly, Tim and I like this word. Especially if we say it MOE- ron instead or MORE- on. We like to refer to our heinies as our BOO- tocks. Not sure why, exactly. The kids use this, too, and no one knows what they are talking about.
Now that I've introduced "butts" into this posting let me just say that my kids absolutely delight in calling each other something with the word butt in it. Buttface, butthead, buttcheeks, stinkybutt, bigbutt, goatbutt, any way of including "butt" in a compound word/sentence is very satisfying to them. In an effort to curb this tendency I introduced a list of names that would be acceptable for them to call each other:
nitwit
knucklehead
nincompoop
barnacle
dimwit
dingleberry
dingaling
The first two words are complements of two students I had, Megan and Dennis, (brother and sister) who would call each other those names. It amused me greatly.
We added the following word since the kids liked the PBS show Cyberchase so much.
duncebucket
For me the beauty in name calling is coming up with something so preposterous it's more humorous than insulting , you "protoplasmal primordial atomic globule."
Hormonally yours,
Peg
"...protoplasmal primordial atomic globule..." Gilbert and Sullivan The Mikado
About Me
- Peg
- Pennsylvania, United States
- What changes hath time wrought...mostly a different hair-color, a few wrinkles and loss of short-term memory.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Evergreen Hunting Season Begins
We always go hunting for our Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. No license necessary to kill the poor, defenseless evergreen. The weather report predicted snow showers. So we dressed accordingly. This was my son's first wearing of long underwear. We all wore snowpants and were excited to be out in the first snowfall of the year. As you can see by the photo it was blue skies- freezing cold- but sunny. I think our tree is a bit compact. It's taller than my husband but I think we usually have one a couple feet taller. I found one almost immediately that I knew we would have to trim a foot or two off the top but was vetoed. Tim prefers to spend hours searching for the perfect tree- which we would do before kids. We always ended up selecting one of first trees we marked. I am by no means an interior decorator but I do have a good sense of space. Here's our 2010 tree:
Tim found this tree farm online: Renick's in West Sunbury. It was a bit farther than we usually drive but it was worth it. We had to drive to a field a half a mile away and hike through a field to the trees. Once cut the owners will twine it so it fit in the back of van.We prefer a Fraser Fir because of the short, soft needles and the limbs are sturdy enough to support large ornaments. (I don't think we'll get many large ornaments on this tree.) Usually it stays fresh for over a month. Last year we didn't have good luck with the fir tree. Needles were dropping a week before Christmas! But there were brown needles on it when we cut it down. That's why we had to find a new tree farm.
We found this carcass in our tree: It looks like a horseshoe crab shell! I've got evolution on the mind while reading Bill Bryson's *A Short History of Nearly Everything.Back to the day's adventure: Af ter our tree was situated in the back of our van we turned the GPS on to find a nearby restaurant. Our GPS hates us. We don't always listen to its instructions and I think it holds a grudge and gives us bogus directions. Today we missed a turn, which would take us into the parking lot of a mall. We turned 100 yards farther along into the same mall. It kept telling to make a u-turn, which we did not do. Finally it told us to take the road out of the mall and onto the highway where we were suppose to make a U-TURN!!! It's been a long time since I took my driving test but I can't recall when it is legal to make a u-turn, if ever? We retraced our route and went into the mall the way the GPS had originally instructed and lo and behold there was the Texas Roadhouse to our left! We'd driven right by it!
We enjoyed our lunch- I highly recommend the Portabella Mushroom Chicken. It came with the largest sweet potato I've ever seen. We brought home enough food for the next several days. The weird thing was we saw our next-door neighbor there! We were 42 miles south of our homes and we ended up at the same restaurant at the same time. I think that's bizarre.
We ended up shopping at this mall (Clearview Mall) since we had a fantastic parking spot. We didn't purchase a thing there but since both kids were so patient they were rewarded with a sit in a massage chair. It's funny, neither child likes the kiddy rides where you insert a couple quarters and it throttles them about. They saw these chairs as soon as we entered the mall and they were hooked. If they behaved they could ride the chairs before we left.
We took a different route home: Rte. 8 the whole way! We did stop at a strange-looking place along Rte. 8- a large, silver, saucer-shaped UFO would be a good description. It was called Playthings Etc. We spent a couple hours there. They had some of the most unusual and interesting playthings. Sarah bought a whoopee cushion for Jacob for Christmas. They're a bit obsessed with those things. Although they call them "Whompie Cushions."
Twenty-nine days until Christmas. Something has happened to make time speed up. That's bizarre, too.
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Behind Thanksgiving
I had planned to do a Thanksgiving acrostic using trivia from a book called Eating the Plates: A Pilgrim book of Food and Manners. I'm going to try but had some trouble doing a rough draft. So...if this in an incomplete acrostic, I apologize.
Tongue of ox- also known as neat's tongue; the 66-day trip across the Atlantic was a miserable one for the 202 passengers. These folks ate moldy cheese, dried peas, salty beef and dried fish. A large supply of ship's biscuits were stacked in huge piles. They were made of wheat flour, pea flour and water. They were flat and round, the size of dinner plates. They were also hard as rock. Their favorite meat was neat's tongue- dried ox tongue. The Pilgrims hated water and washed down their meals with beer, ale, wine, gin and brandy. Even children drank beer.
Holland first- The Pilgrims went to Holland first to test the waters of religious freedom. The Dutch treated them well and fairly. But the Pilgrims "thought the Dutch were more interested in money and fun than they were in religion." The Pilgrims were afraid their children would be adversely affected by their (the Dutch) influence. That was when they decided to travel to America.
Always hungry always cold. They left England September 6, 1620. Nothing like some cool air for your trip on the open ocean. It would have to be better than hot humid air!
Never changed their clothes the entire trip. All the passengers stayed in one room. The odor must have been Noxious.
Knife- everyone had to have their own knife. Adults were allowed to thrust knife into a cooking pot to spear a piece of food but children weren't to take any food for themselves. They could only eat whatever their parents handed to them.
Saints and Strangers- The Pilgrims could not afford the cost of a trip across the Atlantic. So they made a deal with a group of investors called Merchant Adventurers. They hired the Mayflower, and provided food and supplies. In return the Pilgrims agreed to give the Merchant Adventurers everything of value they found in America for 7 years. The Pilgrims would only keep what they needed to stay alive. The MA made the same deal with other travelers on the Mayflower. The Pilgrims called these other settlers "Strangers."
Good gravy my shoulder hurts this Thanksgiving day. I already had some trouble straightening my arm upward, but Friday I got a Tetanus/Whooping Cough Booster in same arm. Since I had had a tetanus almost exactly 2 years ago the nurse warned me I may have some muscle pain. Saturday was the worst, but after some soaking and massaging it seemed to be on the mend. Then on Monday what did we work on in Yoga? Shoulders!!! I could do everything while there without too much discomfort. But the next few days have been a bit iffy. I still cannot sleep on my right side. My complaint seems to lack Gravity next to the tribulations the Pilgrims went through just to avoid religious persecution.
Insects- Little insects like weevils, maggots and grubs chewed tunnels into the ship's biscuits so some Pilgrims preferred to eat at night in the dark.
Variety of schemes to trick the Indians- they would bury their dead at night so the Indians would not see the decimation of their population. All the healthy men would march up and down and fire their rifles with the hope the Indians thought they had a big army. They brought large canons from the ship and mounted them high on a hill.
Indians were surprisingly friendly. Samoset and Squanto assisted the new arrivals to plant crops. They also assisted in procuring a treaty between Chief Massasoit promising no Indian attacks.
Napkins- It was fine to eat with your fingers, grabbing food right from the pot, but you had to at least wipe your fingers before doing so. The Pilgrims had BIG napkins that they threw over their shoulder or tied around their necks. It hung down almost to their knees. You could use the napkin to grab pieces of hot food, too.
Guns made a tremendous noise which made hunting difficult. The guns were not very accurate, either. The Indians traded deer meat in exchange for beads and knives. The Pilgrims were thrilled; back in England only the richest people ever ate deer meat.
The Mayflower Compact was signed before the passengers were allowed to disembark. It said they would form a colony with "just and equall lawes for all." It makes me so proud that this was foremost on the Pilgrims' minds way back in 1620. The Saints and the Strangers were both Pilgrims now. They knew to insure their survival they would have to work side-by-side and compromise. After being cooped up for sixty-six days in foul conditions tempers were probably short. The fact that these people survived is a true testament to self-determination.
Penner, Lucille Recht. Eating the Plates: A Pilgrim Book of Food and Manners. New York: Scholastic Inc., 1991
*I just read this Mayflower reference: If your two parents hadn't bonded just when they did-possibly to the nanosecond-you wouldn't be here. Like wise for your parents parents and so on and so on. Continue further to the time of the Mayflower Pilgrims and you have no fewer than 16, 384 ancestors exchanging genetic material in a way that would, eventually and miraculously, result in you.
*This info comes almost word for word from Bill Bryson *A Short History of Nearly Everything p. 397
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Tongue of ox- also known as neat's tongue; the 66-day trip across the Atlantic was a miserable one for the 202 passengers. These folks ate moldy cheese, dried peas, salty beef and dried fish. A large supply of ship's biscuits were stacked in huge piles. They were made of wheat flour, pea flour and water. They were flat and round, the size of dinner plates. They were also hard as rock. Their favorite meat was neat's tongue- dried ox tongue. The Pilgrims hated water and washed down their meals with beer, ale, wine, gin and brandy. Even children drank beer.
Holland first- The Pilgrims went to Holland first to test the waters of religious freedom. The Dutch treated them well and fairly. But the Pilgrims "thought the Dutch were more interested in money and fun than they were in religion." The Pilgrims were afraid their children would be adversely affected by their (the Dutch) influence. That was when they decided to travel to America.
Always hungry always cold. They left England September 6, 1620. Nothing like some cool air for your trip on the open ocean. It would have to be better than hot humid air!
Never changed their clothes the entire trip. All the passengers stayed in one room. The odor must have been Noxious.
Knife- everyone had to have their own knife. Adults were allowed to thrust knife into a cooking pot to spear a piece of food but children weren't to take any food for themselves. They could only eat whatever their parents handed to them.
Saints and Strangers- The Pilgrims could not afford the cost of a trip across the Atlantic. So they made a deal with a group of investors called Merchant Adventurers. They hired the Mayflower, and provided food and supplies. In return the Pilgrims agreed to give the Merchant Adventurers everything of value they found in America for 7 years. The Pilgrims would only keep what they needed to stay alive. The MA made the same deal with other travelers on the Mayflower. The Pilgrims called these other settlers "Strangers."
Good gravy my shoulder hurts this Thanksgiving day. I already had some trouble straightening my arm upward, but Friday I got a Tetanus/Whooping Cough Booster in same arm. Since I had had a tetanus almost exactly 2 years ago the nurse warned me I may have some muscle pain. Saturday was the worst, but after some soaking and massaging it seemed to be on the mend. Then on Monday what did we work on in Yoga? Shoulders!!! I could do everything while there without too much discomfort. But the next few days have been a bit iffy. I still cannot sleep on my right side. My complaint seems to lack Gravity next to the tribulations the Pilgrims went through just to avoid religious persecution.
Insects- Little insects like weevils, maggots and grubs chewed tunnels into the ship's biscuits so some Pilgrims preferred to eat at night in the dark.
Variety of schemes to trick the Indians- they would bury their dead at night so the Indians would not see the decimation of their population. All the healthy men would march up and down and fire their rifles with the hope the Indians thought they had a big army. They brought large canons from the ship and mounted them high on a hill.
Indians were surprisingly friendly. Samoset and Squanto assisted the new arrivals to plant crops. They also assisted in procuring a treaty between Chief Massasoit promising no Indian attacks.
Napkins- It was fine to eat with your fingers, grabbing food right from the pot, but you had to at least wipe your fingers before doing so. The Pilgrims had BIG napkins that they threw over their shoulder or tied around their necks. It hung down almost to their knees. You could use the napkin to grab pieces of hot food, too.
Guns made a tremendous noise which made hunting difficult. The guns were not very accurate, either. The Indians traded deer meat in exchange for beads and knives. The Pilgrims were thrilled; back in England only the richest people ever ate deer meat.
The Mayflower Compact was signed before the passengers were allowed to disembark. It said they would form a colony with "just and equall lawes for all." It makes me so proud that this was foremost on the Pilgrims' minds way back in 1620. The Saints and the Strangers were both Pilgrims now. They knew to insure their survival they would have to work side-by-side and compromise. After being cooped up for sixty-six days in foul conditions tempers were probably short. The fact that these people survived is a true testament to self-determination.
Penner, Lucille Recht. Eating the Plates: A Pilgrim Book of Food and Manners. New York: Scholastic Inc., 1991
*I just read this Mayflower reference: If your two parents hadn't bonded just when they did-possibly to the nanosecond-you wouldn't be here. Like wise for your parents parents and so on and so on. Continue further to the time of the Mayflower Pilgrims and you have no fewer than 16, 384 ancestors exchanging genetic material in a way that would, eventually and miraculously, result in you.
*This info comes almost word for word from Bill Bryson *A Short History of Nearly Everything p. 397
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Deathly Hallows Review (SPOILER ALERT)
Let me start by saying my review may be skewed negatively because of the terrible seats we had because I never imagined there would be a full house on a Tuesday after the movie had been out for 4 days! It will also be skewed negatively because I am very protective of the books/stories/characters. Therein lies the problem with this movie, as in all the previous ones:
The books/stories are so full. I understand the movies have to leave something out, but why add things that weren't in the book and are misleading to boot! Two instances in this movie just tick me off: again SPOILER ALERT.
1. After Ron splits leaving Harry and Hermione alone, Harry tries to cheer Hermione by DANCING with her. If you've seen The Goblet of Fire movie you know Harry HATES dancing and doesn't do it well. It also made it seem as if Harry was thinking of MORE than dancing. The books made it crystal clear with whom Harry and Hermione were in love but the movies always try to show a weird love triangle that never existed. Again, wasn't in the book, adds nothing to the story.
2. The ending of the movie was the pits. SPOILER ALERT If you've read the book you know that Voldemort was not able to command the elder wand he took from Dumbledore's lifeless hands because you have to win the wand in combat or be given the wand. Yet the movie showed him using the wand to send a lightning bolt/pillar of fire (?) to the sky! Again, didn't happen in the book and will seriously undermine how the end works out! Why will Voldemort kill Snape if he can manipulate the elder wand? The wand is rightfully Harry's and should only work properly at his command. I may have actually given this movie a thumb's up if it hadn't ended this way.
3. We took my 9-year old daughter (a Potter enthusiast- we read/she read all 7 books. That was a prerequisite to watching the final 3 ---4 since the last book was made into 2--- movies.) Sarah had seen the previous movies so nothing really frightened her in this film. We all jumped when Nagini jumped out, but we were only a row away from the screen. It was almost 3D! Of all the things to add we had a scene of Harry and Hermione naked in an embrace. No specific body parts were shown, but it was enough. This was when Ron had returned and was attempting to destroy the locket and Voldemort's soul tried to hurt Ron by showing him Hermione preferred Harry,which of course was untrue-- but tell that to the screenwriter (see complaint #1). I think Sarah wanted to ask about it but wasn't sure how/what to say. Just like my mother, I don't allow Sarah to watch things like that. So that was a bit of a shock for us both to see.
4. Sarah noted this change: Narcissa Malfoy had black hair with a gray stripe a la bride of Frankenstein . In the books it was noted a few times how opposite she was of her sister, Bellatrix. In the previous movie Narcissa had blond hair. Little changes like that are annoying, too. I think it showed that she had a tiny smidgen of decency left in her- that fact she was opposite in looks from the crazy chick, Bellatrix. (I was incorrect. I put in HP and the Half-Blood Prince and Narcissa did have the bride-of-Frankstein 'do. I'm sure she appeared in one of the movies with blond hair.)
5. I really wish Kreacher had had more screen time. In the book when he decides Harry is not terrible and wants to be helpful is so touching. And when he wanted to doink Mundungus on the head with a frying pan- priceless. I'm really surprised that didn't make it into the movie. Dobby and his little boots-in the movie- was so endearing. Sarah knew he wasn't going to survive this movie but she still had a little sniffle when it happened. I think I even choked up a bit. I don't know if those who haven't read the book will feel that way because Dobby though present in most of the books was absent from most of the other movies!
I feel the same way about the lack of Fred and George Weasley and their pranks and their attitude towards life in general. They made the books so refreshing when the content was heavy. I think the producers had to decide which direction they should take these films: action or drama (dramedy would have been my choice.) It sure looks like they chose action.
A nice surprise was Xenophillius Lovegood. (Not sure of Xeno's spelling.) He looked like Lucius Malfoy in the early movies. I would have casted someone who looked a bit crazier, but he was appealing.
Since we're nearing the end of the movies let me just say I think Rupert Grint was the best cast out of all the main characters. He looks and acts the part exactly how I imagined Ron Weasley in the book would act and sound. My favorite actor was the girl who played Luna Lovegood. I think she was well cast in looks and actions.
I originally was not going to see this movie. I'm glad I did, but will not be lured to the theater for the last movie. I can wait for the small screen showing. I'm anxiously awaiting Dec. 4 when Eclipse comes out on DVD.
Hormonally yours,
Peg
The books/stories are so full. I understand the movies have to leave something out, but why add things that weren't in the book and are misleading to boot! Two instances in this movie just tick me off: again SPOILER ALERT.
1. After Ron splits leaving Harry and Hermione alone, Harry tries to cheer Hermione by DANCING with her. If you've seen The Goblet of Fire movie you know Harry HATES dancing and doesn't do it well. It also made it seem as if Harry was thinking of MORE than dancing. The books made it crystal clear with whom Harry and Hermione were in love but the movies always try to show a weird love triangle that never existed. Again, wasn't in the book, adds nothing to the story.
2. The ending of the movie was the pits. SPOILER ALERT If you've read the book you know that Voldemort was not able to command the elder wand he took from Dumbledore's lifeless hands because you have to win the wand in combat or be given the wand. Yet the movie showed him using the wand to send a lightning bolt/pillar of fire (?) to the sky! Again, didn't happen in the book and will seriously undermine how the end works out! Why will Voldemort kill Snape if he can manipulate the elder wand? The wand is rightfully Harry's and should only work properly at his command. I may have actually given this movie a thumb's up if it hadn't ended this way.
3. We took my 9-year old daughter (a Potter enthusiast- we read/she read all 7 books. That was a prerequisite to watching the final 3 ---4 since the last book was made into 2--- movies.) Sarah had seen the previous movies so nothing really frightened her in this film. We all jumped when Nagini jumped out, but we were only a row away from the screen. It was almost 3D! Of all the things to add we had a scene of Harry and Hermione naked in an embrace. No specific body parts were shown, but it was enough. This was when Ron had returned and was attempting to destroy the locket and Voldemort's soul tried to hurt Ron by showing him Hermione preferred Harry,which of course was untrue-- but tell that to the screenwriter (see complaint #1). I think Sarah wanted to ask about it but wasn't sure how/what to say. Just like my mother, I don't allow Sarah to watch things like that. So that was a bit of a shock for us both to see.
4. Sarah noted this change: Narcissa Malfoy had black hair with a gray stripe a la bride of Frankenstein . In the books it was noted a few times how opposite she was of her sister, Bellatrix. In the previous movie Narcissa had blond hair. Little changes like that are annoying, too. I think it showed that she had a tiny smidgen of decency left in her- that fact she was opposite in looks from the crazy chick, Bellatrix. (I was incorrect. I put in HP and the Half-Blood Prince and Narcissa did have the bride-of-Frankstein 'do. I'm sure she appeared in one of the movies with blond hair.)
5. I really wish Kreacher had had more screen time. In the book when he decides Harry is not terrible and wants to be helpful is so touching. And when he wanted to doink Mundungus on the head with a frying pan- priceless. I'm really surprised that didn't make it into the movie. Dobby and his little boots-in the movie- was so endearing. Sarah knew he wasn't going to survive this movie but she still had a little sniffle when it happened. I think I even choked up a bit. I don't know if those who haven't read the book will feel that way because Dobby though present in most of the books was absent from most of the other movies!
I feel the same way about the lack of Fred and George Weasley and their pranks and their attitude towards life in general. They made the books so refreshing when the content was heavy. I think the producers had to decide which direction they should take these films: action or drama (dramedy would have been my choice.) It sure looks like they chose action.
A nice surprise was Xenophillius Lovegood. (Not sure of Xeno's spelling.) He looked like Lucius Malfoy in the early movies. I would have casted someone who looked a bit crazier, but he was appealing.
Since we're nearing the end of the movies let me just say I think Rupert Grint was the best cast out of all the main characters. He looks and acts the part exactly how I imagined Ron Weasley in the book would act and sound. My favorite actor was the girl who played Luna Lovegood. I think she was well cast in looks and actions.
I originally was not going to see this movie. I'm glad I did, but will not be lured to the theater for the last movie. I can wait for the small screen showing. I'm anxiously awaiting Dec. 4 when Eclipse comes out on DVD.
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Monday, November 22, 2010
HDTV PhD
Last night I heard an add for an upcoming news segment on a Pittsburgh station: " You pretty much need a PhD to buy an HDTV. "
I thought that was humorous because my husband and I are at odds about a TV purchase. We have a high def TV and it's big, but I honestly do not get any more enjoyment watching that than I do our old nonHD TV. The big old set is in the playroom attached to a dvd/vcr player. (We still have videotapes we, our kids, watch.) So when he told me he found this great deal I thought that meant cheap. No. It meant it comes with all sorts of add-ons that I don't want! We only let our kids watch 2 hours a day, maybe more for a movie on the weekends. This great deal includes a Blue Ray player. We don't have ANY blu-ray movies. ( I just looked that up-what IS a blu-ray???) I don't think he even knows what that means. But, and this is the worst, it can play 3D movies. The price for the 3D glasses are $199.00!!!!!! Yes, that decimal point is in the right place. Supposedly it comes with two of them. So that means when we watch a 3D movie as a family the kids will be OK but Tim and I will be in danger of seizures! I'm not making light of that affliction I have no doubt but we could seize.
Tim pulled up some reviews of this leviathan for me to read. I agree with the news program- we need a training program for us casual, non-techinical viewers.
Hormonally yours,
Peg
I thought that was humorous because my husband and I are at odds about a TV purchase. We have a high def TV and it's big, but I honestly do not get any more enjoyment watching that than I do our old nonHD TV. The big old set is in the playroom attached to a dvd/vcr player. (We still have videotapes we, our kids, watch.) So when he told me he found this great deal I thought that meant cheap. No. It meant it comes with all sorts of add-ons that I don't want! We only let our kids watch 2 hours a day, maybe more for a movie on the weekends. This great deal includes a Blue Ray player. We don't have ANY blu-ray movies. ( I just looked that up-what IS a blu-ray???) I don't think he even knows what that means. But, and this is the worst, it can play 3D movies. The price for the 3D glasses are $199.00!!!!!! Yes, that decimal point is in the right place. Supposedly it comes with two of them. So that means when we watch a 3D movie as a family the kids will be OK but Tim and I will be in danger of seizures! I'm not making light of that affliction I have no doubt but we could seize.
Tim pulled up some reviews of this leviathan for me to read. I agree with the news program- we need a training program for us casual, non-techinical viewers.
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Hormonally Yours
I think I should rename my blog to this. I did not coin this phrase. It comes from a couple of wonderful musicians known as Shakespear's Sister who used it for their album name in 1992. When I lived in Erie in the early 90s my friend, who lived in the apartment above me, made me a tape of some of their songs. I really like one called Moonchild and tried to find an MP3 of it. The best/safest way I could procure this song was to buy a used cd. It arrived a couple weeks ago and I LOVE IT! The songs from this album can be found on you-tube. 16th Apology sounds a lot like me (in the early 90s). I didn't start this blog to be about Shakespear's Sister but the title of the album: Hormonally Yours.
It made me think of other words I could change by adding -ally to it like Mormonally Yours. That was my first thought. I don't know much about Mormonism so I'm not going to elaborate on that one.
My husband's blog should be titled, "KidneyStonally Yours." Those are the nastiest little nuggets! He keeps them in a little plastic container. I have never asked him exactly HOW he catches these tiny daggers. I'm pretty sure the procedure is one I don't need to know.
My son, Jacob's blog would be "Cyclonally Yours." It's quite the phenomena how Legos end up spread throughout our playroom. I just thoroughly cleaned this room today and was mortified everytime I moved a piece of furniture and found more tiny Legos in dust bunnies -- along with a lot of other not-so-tiny toys.
My daughter's blog would be "PiaNOnally Yours." She plays the piano so well but is so stubborn about NOT practicing. She's been working on White Christmas for at least a month. She can play the notes but can't keep a rhythm. My attempts to help her are met with the evil eye.
I think I'm going to start signing my letters...
Hormonally yours,
Peg
It made me think of other words I could change by adding -ally to it like Mormonally Yours. That was my first thought. I don't know much about Mormonism so I'm not going to elaborate on that one.
My husband's blog should be titled, "KidneyStonally Yours." Those are the nastiest little nuggets! He keeps them in a little plastic container. I have never asked him exactly HOW he catches these tiny daggers. I'm pretty sure the procedure is one I don't need to know.
My son, Jacob's blog would be "Cyclonally Yours." It's quite the phenomena how Legos end up spread throughout our playroom. I just thoroughly cleaned this room today and was mortified everytime I moved a piece of furniture and found more tiny Legos in dust bunnies -- along with a lot of other not-so-tiny toys.
My daughter's blog would be "PiaNOnally Yours." She plays the piano so well but is so stubborn about NOT practicing. She's been working on White Christmas for at least a month. She can play the notes but can't keep a rhythm. My attempts to help her are met with the evil eye.
I think I'm going to start signing my letters...
Hormonally yours,
Peg
Friday, November 19, 2010
What Does Gay Mean?
"What does gay mean?" my 9-year old daughter just asked me. I said it depends on how it's used. Use it in a sentence. "Some kids at school say Justin Beaver is gay."
Let's go back 90 minutes. We went to Pizza Hut because Sarah had a Book-It pizza slip she was in the mood to use. On the table there were a couple games to play to pass the time. One game was to name 3 things in 5 seconds. One was name 3 pets you would not like to have. Another was name 3 states that border the Pacific Ocean. I asked my husband Name 3 Rappers. I was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to name one. But before he even opened his mouth Sarah yelled, "Justin Beaver!" I furrowed my brow and asked, "What did you say?" Again she said, "Justin Beaver." I looked at Tim and snickered. I explained that I didn't think he was a rapper and was pretty sure his name was Justin Bieber.
Well, at home, Sarah and I were in the living room; Sarah playing on her new DSi and I reading Entertainment Weekly. Out of the blue she asks this blog's title question. After she used it in the sentence I said when people use "gay" that way they think they're insulting someone. She then asked if it meant he goes out with other boys. I said yes. It's probably meant to say Justin Bieber is not very macho.
My daughter is much more knowledgeable than I give her credit for...last Saturday night when my friend, Julie, and I went to see The Kids Are Alright I called a new babysitter, Olivia. When I told the kids who would be watching them Jacob, 5, asked, "Who's Olivia?" And Sarah goes, "She's hot." I laughed and told Sarah that girls don't usually call other girls "hot." Sarah reponded, "But she is! I know boys would say that about girls."
I think I was more disturbed by her use of the word "hot." (I think of Paris Hilton when I hear "hot" used that way---not a role model I'd choose for my child.) Sarah's been trying out a few new words lately. She's been using the word "sucker" frequently. I just asked her to try not to say that. It just sounds so trashy. But then again I'm a word-bully. I'm currently trying to get my kids to say,"affirmative" instead of yeah/yes and "prognosis negative" when their answer is no. So I don't know how fired up I should get about their vocabulary choice.
Back to the title topic. I was hoping to put off conversations like this for a few more years. Sarah has asked if she can marry her dad or her brother. Those questions were easy enough to answer without much detail. Jacob has more questions about babies and if it hurts to have them cut from the belly. I finally just said it's more natural for babies to come out where girls pee. Oddly, or maybe not, he seemed more squeamish by the belly cut then the other baby-delivery route.
I don't think I even knew what "gay" meant when I was in high school.
Justin Beaver
Let's go back 90 minutes. We went to Pizza Hut because Sarah had a Book-It pizza slip she was in the mood to use. On the table there were a couple games to play to pass the time. One game was to name 3 things in 5 seconds. One was name 3 pets you would not like to have. Another was name 3 states that border the Pacific Ocean. I asked my husband Name 3 Rappers. I was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to name one. But before he even opened his mouth Sarah yelled, "Justin Beaver!" I furrowed my brow and asked, "What did you say?" Again she said, "Justin Beaver." I looked at Tim and snickered. I explained that I didn't think he was a rapper and was pretty sure his name was Justin Bieber.
Well, at home, Sarah and I were in the living room; Sarah playing on her new DSi and I reading Entertainment Weekly. Out of the blue she asks this blog's title question. After she used it in the sentence I said when people use "gay" that way they think they're insulting someone. She then asked if it meant he goes out with other boys. I said yes. It's probably meant to say Justin Bieber is not very macho.
My daughter is much more knowledgeable than I give her credit for...last Saturday night when my friend, Julie, and I went to see The Kids Are Alright I called a new babysitter, Olivia. When I told the kids who would be watching them Jacob, 5, asked, "Who's Olivia?" And Sarah goes, "She's hot." I laughed and told Sarah that girls don't usually call other girls "hot." Sarah reponded, "But she is! I know boys would say that about girls."
I think I was more disturbed by her use of the word "hot." (I think of Paris Hilton when I hear "hot" used that way---not a role model I'd choose for my child.) Sarah's been trying out a few new words lately. She's been using the word "sucker" frequently. I just asked her to try not to say that. It just sounds so trashy. But then again I'm a word-bully. I'm currently trying to get my kids to say,"affirmative" instead of yeah/yes and "prognosis negative" when their answer is no. So I don't know how fired up I should get about their vocabulary choice.
Back to the title topic. I was hoping to put off conversations like this for a few more years. Sarah has asked if she can marry her dad or her brother. Those questions were easy enough to answer without much detail. Jacob has more questions about babies and if it hurts to have them cut from the belly. I finally just said it's more natural for babies to come out where girls pee. Oddly, or maybe not, he seemed more squeamish by the belly cut then the other baby-delivery route.
I don't think I even knew what "gay" meant when I was in high school.
Justin Beaver
Thursday, November 18, 2010
The Funny Pages Aren't Necessarily the Comics
A few months back I saw the most hilarious article in my hometown newspaper. (See clip above. If you click on it it's big enough to easily read.) Even rereading it today makes me laugh. He wasn't trying to resuscitate a fresh possum, but a 'long-dead opussum.' Oh, how I wish I could have seen this. This was a local (western PA) story. I wasn't terribly surprised by this story, just highly amused. Today's paper featured a story about a Wisconsin man shooting his TV. This is in The Derrick today- page 16. Maybe you can read it at http://www.thederrick.com/ The headline reads, Wisonsin man accused of shooting TV over Palin dance number (That is one long headline.)
Steven Cowan, 67, came home from a bar, had a beer with dinner then sat down with his wife to watch "Dancing with the Stars." ( A reality show meant to get your inner fire roaring.) When Bristol Palin began her routine the man, " jumped up and began swearing..." He left the room and "reappeared 20 minutes later with his shotgun, 'raging with his face bright red, and blasted the TV.'" I don't know exactly why I find this so funny. I suspect its the use of the word "blasted." But he then tells his wife to go "fetch" his pistols. Good Lord, what's he going to do with the pistols??? I imagine an old cabinet TV with a big, jagged, black hole where the picture screen once was. Is he going to use a pistol on the big ceramic rooster clock atop the TV? [The following is verbatim from the article.] According to the criminal complaint, Steven Cowan's daughter recently took away his handguns for safekeeping. It did not elaborate. " He scared the bejebees out of me," she told detectives. ---I'm pretty sure it's the daughter's "bejebees" word choice that's funny. I don't think I've ever seen that word in The Derrick.
The wife told officers that about 15 years ago her husband had threatened her with a machete when he couldn't find some ammunition and threatened to shoot one of their cows. ---Now, was he looking for ammunition to shoot one of the cows or was he just so mad he was going to "blast" a cow because of the missing ammunition? I just snorted as I wrote that. Obviously this man has some mental health issues and possibly the wife does, too, if she offered this story with no "I should have left him then" comment.
The Possum CPR story is still funnier, hands down. but this one has some chuckle charm.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Are We Better Off Ted?
I have a love/hate relationship with TV. Certain shows I love and most of the rest I hate. I read Entertainment Weekly and one of the things that annoys me about [entertainment magazines] is that I always feel they're trying to tell me what I should watch and what I shouldn't based on one or two critic/journalists' opinion. Sometimes they get it right- like Modern Family a delightful show- and sometimes the get it wrong- Hawaii Five-0. (Sorry, I watched the first show and liked it until the female detective character was introduced. And I don't think it was HER so much as her dialogue.) One show I had seen mentioned in EW was Better Off Ted. It was labeled a good show that no one was watching. They said the same thing about Arrested Development. Tried to watch that and just didn't like it. Well...
Being in charge of the Fundraisers at my daughters school sometimes includes lengthy, tedious tasks that I can do while watching TV. So I went to Netflix- which I love- and watched the first episode of Better Off Ted. It still makes me laugh thinking about it. Now, what made me chuckle in this first show was a bit of a steal from a Seinfeld show. [When Jerry ended up with Kramer's blood and then ultimately Newman's for a transfusion and he screams, then Kramer screams, then Newman screams. Still gets a LOL from me. I've noticed a few Seinfeld steals lately in shows.] I continued to watch and must say I've never been disappointed by one episode and I'm almost through season one. Ted, played by Jay Harrington, is IMO the perfect character. You can't help but like this guy. I've never seen him in anything else and this role seems tailor made for him. Portia de Rossi is perfect as his unscrupulous, soul-less boss. The two inept but genius scientists are played to perfection, also. It is certainly not politically correct but that's the premise of the whole show.
Today's moral of the blog: What you read, including this, is not the gospel truth. Just one person's opinion. Be open to trying new things and forming your own judgements. You'll be glad you did.
Being in charge of the Fundraisers at my daughters school sometimes includes lengthy, tedious tasks that I can do while watching TV. So I went to Netflix- which I love- and watched the first episode of Better Off Ted. It still makes me laugh thinking about it. Now, what made me chuckle in this first show was a bit of a steal from a Seinfeld show. [When Jerry ended up with Kramer's blood and then ultimately Newman's for a transfusion and he screams, then Kramer screams, then Newman screams. Still gets a LOL from me. I've noticed a few Seinfeld steals lately in shows.] I continued to watch and must say I've never been disappointed by one episode and I'm almost through season one. Ted, played by Jay Harrington, is IMO the perfect character. You can't help but like this guy. I've never seen him in anything else and this role seems tailor made for him. Portia de Rossi is perfect as his unscrupulous, soul-less boss. The two inept but genius scientists are played to perfection, also. It is certainly not politically correct but that's the premise of the whole show.
Today's moral of the blog: What you read, including this, is not the gospel truth. Just one person's opinion. Be open to trying new things and forming your own judgements. You'll be glad you did.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Long Time, No Movie
Well, my friend Julie and I went on a "date" last night to see a lesbian movie. I put date in quotes because that was her word. Her husband, who wasn't invited, noted her word-choice and ribbed her about it. The movie was The Kids Are Alright and it was showing (for free) at our local college campus, where my friend is currently attending. Julie had asked me a few weeks ago---while picking up my daughter at HER daughter's birthday slumber party--- to keep this night open to see it. I was surprised she wanted to see this movie. We didn't have time to discuss it any further. I had read reviews of it and knew it was probably going to have some Oscar nominations in its future so I was more than willing to see it. We usually chat at our Monday yoga class but she had missed the last two sessions and so I never heard what had drawn her to this movie. We were the first to arrive at the mini-theater and I discovered she thought this was a comedy. It was mildly amusing...but also poignant and thought-provoking.
I'll say this right out: I have no interest in what someone's sexual preference is. I don't judge anyone. I may be mildly curious about how one's life unfolds with someone of the same gender. But I feel it is not a choice but an inborn trait that cannot be vanquished. So I was wildly- I WAS going to write "mildly"- surprised when one female partner cheated on her mate with a man. I think that will be fodder for those who are homophobic and believe it is just people choosing that lifestyle. While the women in the movie chose to give birth to children through artificial insemination, they each used sperm from the same donor. This made their children biologically half-siblings. I think that is a good idea. What is thought-provoking is these children, now teens, wanted to contact their donor father. This is what makes the whole story for this movie. This is just one instance and of course the whole situation is contrived but what about those sperm-donor kids who do go looking for their bio dads and find them entirely reprehensible? How would that make that child feel? Would they worry that they could become like that person? Can nurture overcome nature? I certainly don't have the answers but I think those are points that prospective parents might consider.
The movie was so poignant because the love of parents for their kids was so apparent and embarrassing. Just as it truly is and should be.
The ending was terrible. Julie and I both felt the SD (sperm-donor) dad got a raw deal. The kids brought him into their lives and then deserted him. Mark Ruffalo was the SD dad and he was very convincing. Julie was a fan of his. I could only think of one other movie I'd seen him in (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind). I just added some of his movies to my Netflix queue.
Now some more delightful movie news: They are going to make a big screen remake of Dark Shadow and Barnabas Collins is going to be played by...Johnny Depp. When I told my hubby they were making a remake I asked him to guess who would portray Barnabas. His response was, 'the guy who played Snape.' I scoffed, but thought, you know, Alan Rickman WOULD be a good vampire! I think Tim had Harry Potter on the brain. He and our 9-year old plan to see The Deathly Hallows Part 1 at the theater when it opens. I refuse. I'm a HUGE fan of the books and NO fan of the movies. I've seen---and we own---them all. But the last movie just killed my interest in them. I understand they can't put in everything from the book, but why add things that didn't happen in the book and adds nothing to the progression of the story? That really ticks me off.
On the subject of movies made from books I just watched The Golden Compass the other night/morning. (Couldn't sleep so the movie entertained me from 12:30- 2:00.) I read all three of Philip Pullman's books a few years back and was excited when a movie was being made. Then the reviews were mostly negative. I hope they ignore the critics and make the next two books into movies because the first one was a pretty dang good. I can't remember specific details from the books but the feeling from the movie reminded me of the feeling I had while reading the books.
I'll say this right out: I have no interest in what someone's sexual preference is. I don't judge anyone. I may be mildly curious about how one's life unfolds with someone of the same gender. But I feel it is not a choice but an inborn trait that cannot be vanquished. So I was wildly- I WAS going to write "mildly"- surprised when one female partner cheated on her mate with a man. I think that will be fodder for those who are homophobic and believe it is just people choosing that lifestyle. While the women in the movie chose to give birth to children through artificial insemination, they each used sperm from the same donor. This made their children biologically half-siblings. I think that is a good idea. What is thought-provoking is these children, now teens, wanted to contact their donor father. This is what makes the whole story for this movie. This is just one instance and of course the whole situation is contrived but what about those sperm-donor kids who do go looking for their bio dads and find them entirely reprehensible? How would that make that child feel? Would they worry that they could become like that person? Can nurture overcome nature? I certainly don't have the answers but I think those are points that prospective parents might consider.
The movie was so poignant because the love of parents for their kids was so apparent and embarrassing. Just as it truly is and should be.
The ending was terrible. Julie and I both felt the SD (sperm-donor) dad got a raw deal. The kids brought him into their lives and then deserted him. Mark Ruffalo was the SD dad and he was very convincing. Julie was a fan of his. I could only think of one other movie I'd seen him in (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind). I just added some of his movies to my Netflix queue.
Now some more delightful movie news: They are going to make a big screen remake of Dark Shadow and Barnabas Collins is going to be played by...Johnny Depp. When I told my hubby they were making a remake I asked him to guess who would portray Barnabas. His response was, 'the guy who played Snape.' I scoffed, but thought, you know, Alan Rickman WOULD be a good vampire! I think Tim had Harry Potter on the brain. He and our 9-year old plan to see The Deathly Hallows Part 1 at the theater when it opens. I refuse. I'm a HUGE fan of the books and NO fan of the movies. I've seen---and we own---them all. But the last movie just killed my interest in them. I understand they can't put in everything from the book, but why add things that didn't happen in the book and adds nothing to the progression of the story? That really ticks me off.
On the subject of movies made from books I just watched The Golden Compass the other night/morning. (Couldn't sleep so the movie entertained me from 12:30- 2:00.) I read all three of Philip Pullman's books a few years back and was excited when a movie was being made. Then the reviews were mostly negative. I hope they ignore the critics and make the next two books into movies because the first one was a pretty dang good. I can't remember specific details from the books but the feeling from the movie reminded me of the feeling I had while reading the books.
Monday, November 1, 2010
The "Fat" Question
Well, my five-year old son threw me for a loop this morning when I pulled out his winter coat for the first time for him to wear to preschool. He put it on, zipped it, then asked,"Do I look fat in this?" It was a thick down jacket, and yes, he looked fatter than when he was NOT wearing it, but I'm not sure why he asked this question.
I do not think I have EVER asked this of anyone in my house. Before my husband and I were married we agreed on certain things I would prefer not to discuss with him. One of those things was my weight. And like a true gentleman, he has never remarked in any way but complimentary about my appearance. Sometimes he stays silent, but that is acceptable. We have very different tastes.
Now, my children, on the other hand are brutally honest. My son asked me, very innocently, to 'move my big butt,' one day. OK. After dropping 25 pounds recently he's now announced I no longer have the biggest butt in the house. Daddy does. I hate to say it, but that's very satisfying to know. He would even bring out a tape measure to be "accurate."
I just remembered...he had a buttock photo fetish, too. He was forever snapping pictures of butts! (Digital cameras have really raised the level of picture taking to an art! LOL) I printed one pic of my tuckus, put it in a frame and left it on his dresser. He was so mortified. Then he put it on his sister's dresser. (She contributed to his buttocks obsession by taking photographs of her grandpa's rear.) so she may have deserved the butt picture on her dresser, too.
The picture finally ended up on their dad's bedside table where it still remains.
I do not think I have EVER asked this of anyone in my house. Before my husband and I were married we agreed on certain things I would prefer not to discuss with him. One of those things was my weight. And like a true gentleman, he has never remarked in any way but complimentary about my appearance. Sometimes he stays silent, but that is acceptable. We have very different tastes.
Now, my children, on the other hand are brutally honest. My son asked me, very innocently, to 'move my big butt,' one day. OK. After dropping 25 pounds recently he's now announced I no longer have the biggest butt in the house. Daddy does. I hate to say it, but that's very satisfying to know. He would even bring out a tape measure to be "accurate."
I just remembered...he had a buttock photo fetish, too. He was forever snapping pictures of butts! (Digital cameras have really raised the level of picture taking to an art! LOL) I printed one pic of my tuckus, put it in a frame and left it on his dresser. He was so mortified. Then he put it on his sister's dresser. (She contributed to his buttocks obsession by taking photographs of her grandpa's rear.) so she may have deserved the butt picture on her dresser, too.
The picture finally ended up on their dad's bedside table where it still remains.
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