A Good Writer's Block?

It occurred to me the other day while I was on a walk that what authors write in their fiction stories may cause friction in their everyday lives. I've never written an adult fiction story but I have written some children's stories with my daughter and son and have some ideas for picture books I would also like to write and illustrate. In those stories my kids had a role. There could be no doubt they were part of the story. Things they did or said were included in the stories. I only recently thought about developing a mature novel. (I wanted to write "adult novel" but that sounded pornographic.) This is mainly because on reaching middle age I've started to reflect on my past and have started to revise bygone situations more to my liking. This should be harmless. No one yet can see inside my head to know what I'm thinking. But taking it a step beyond the brain and recording it on paper/monitor makes it "real." The friction begins when said spouse believes what is written is the truth, not merely a more interesting version of it.

I wonder how many romance novel authors get divorces because of what they've described in a steamy love scene? Is what they're describing what they're experiencing? If yes, then the spouse may feel pride in the description. If no, what are they supposed to feel? Humility?

I read The Divine Comedy several years ago and it always amused me how Dante Alighieri would put contemporaries in various levels of hell! I thought that was a funny prank to play on ass-ociates. But from my new point of view he must have pissed off a lot of people. And how did those folks in hell feel when they read the book? How about members of their family? Did they chuckle? Did they stew and carry a grudge? Everyone now and at the time understands it was a work of fiction. But still, to be publicly pilloried by an acquaintance? That's problematic.

So now considering what I would write in a story I'm curious how much is actual nonfiction in others' writing??? I used to encourage my students to "write what they know." I KNOW my husband would be suspicious. I think he is curious about my relationships prior to our first date. I was very lucky to have dated gentlemen ( yes, even at age 15-21 they were courteous.) who treated me with the utmost decency. I wouldn't change a thing about any of those relationships, even in my imagination.

In 23 years I've never given my husband any reason to BE suspicious. I've never been tempted to change a thing about our lives together. (Warning: the following is a reference to Stephanie Meyers' Twilight Saga.) Honestly, he IS my Edward Cullen. I never met anyone who I could imagine loving or wanting more. But Middle Age does funny things to people. I actually GET why people do weird things to recapture their youth, And though I still don't have any desire for anyone but Tim, a Jacob Black, from across the ocean, has crept into my thoughts. And it's this untested relationship (from exactly 2 decades ago!) that has me creating a story that absolutely did not happen! And it boils down to if I had been the person I am today- 20 years ago, and taken those risks I backed away from then, how would my life be different? That would be the fictional story. For the time being I prefer vampires over werewolves without a doubt. For the sake of my beloved maybe a writer's block should be instituted.